Virginian Opossum

Such a beautiful day today with the kids. They didn't have school, institute day. The sun is shining and we spent hours outside. Miss A was invited to Teresa-Claire's for a playdate. While she was gone, Miss F, Miss N and I went for a walk in the nature, just behind the house. Then Miss F wanted to rake the leaves - all deep colors of red and yellow, so pretty! - and then climbed a tree so high, I couldn't believe. Miss N took a long nap outside, such a nice weather it was. Then in was time to pick up Miss A, and a little visit to Egg Harbor with Chris and Lauren. - Little argument with Miss F because of her table manners, but we made it up!

Back at home, the kids wanted to climb more trees and I made great pictures of them on the pile of leaves (they all need a bath tonight!). While I was busy with taking the pictures, I saw this weird looking animal crossing the back yard. I followed and tried to make pictures. It was pretty far to get a good shot, but I managed one from the side. Miss F checked it in the Audubon book and it's a Virginia Opossum.

I was sure I would be freeked out when I read about this animal. Since we moved here, I realize more and more how dangerous the nature can be. The sweet looking raccoons can attack you or you can get a parasite that can be pretty dangerous. I wrote about that the first year we were here. Then the coyote's in the backyard, the ticks and the lime disease which come with the beautiful deer, weird worms I found when I was cleaning the sand box... Yuck...

that's the mood I'm in when I find the Virginia Opossum article in wikipedia. Let's see how much panic it will bring. The Opossum in an opportunist and you can find the by your garbage bin - we don;t have one outside - (1 point for us). When you scare the Opossum, he goes in a coma for several hours. He looks dead and this way he may save his life - now that's an interesting characteristic - (1 point for the Opossum). He is NOT related to a RAT! (I give 2 points to Opossum for that!) and according to Wikipedia: "They rarely transmit diseases to humans, and are surprisingly resistant to rabies, mainly because they have lower body temperatures than most placental mammals. In addition, opossums limit the spread of Lyme disease, as they successfully kill off most disease carrying ticks that feed on them." 10 points to Opossum and a hug from me - could do it if he wouldn't bite me or go into a coma, maybe. I love that ugly animal!

Now, the girls are in the basement, Miss N is with me talking and crawling. The pumpkin seeds - oh yes, we also carved pumpkins - are in the oven. Have no dinner and I am not proud of it, but having a nice day with the kids. What can I ask for more!

A husband's way of helping

When P says "I'll take the kids to school tomorrow", I try to calm down this little expectation. Sleeping in one morning, huh? After a night of I don't know how many feedings, staying in the bed till 8am is a dream. But husbands are funny creatures who have a diffrent view on helping out with the kids.

One morning like that, the alarm goes at 6.45am. Not mine - yet... Whoever invented the snooze button, well I hope he/she has to listen to his/her significant other's alarm twenty times every morning. Twenty might seem a lot, but it's the price for inventing such a nuissance!

Then around 7.00 am, my alarm starts to buzz. To be honest, I do snooze it a couple of times as well. It's just learning by example, not my character. All that buzzing finally manages to wake up one of the kids - couple rooms further, which surprisingly causes P to get up, go to the restroom, close the door and start to answer his email on his Blackberry - along with the usual business. I will never get to know why calling children triggers this reaction. Never!

While the sounds in the other bedrooms get louder, I hang on to my dream of a free morning and ignore all the "Mooooooommyyyyy"s. A slight irritation starts building up. The longwaited flush of the toilet is unfortunately followed by the sound of the shower. Meanwhile, "Mooooooommyyyy"s are unbearable, the prospect of having the kids at the breakfast table before 7.40am is low and there is no way I can go back to sleep, I get up.

There's work to be done in the morning, mothers know. Miss A is having trouble picking her clothes and she is not willing to try it without help. Miss F is sitting on her usual spot in front of the closet; the clothes will come to her?! I take things into my hand and 20 minutes later, the girls are downstairs, including Miss N - in clothes, clean dipered and nursed. The breakfast (cereal and a glass of worm Nesquik, I won't pretend I prepare pancakes during the week) is ready. While we are eating, P comes downstairs, with his perfect hairdoe, smelling aftershave. He eats with us, and helps me to tell the girls to prepare their lunch - it's almost time to leave for school.

Everybody is ready, the lunch baskets are by the garage door, Miss N sits in her carseat, my blood is boiling from all the "Hurry up"s and "we are late"s; P says, "don't worry, I will bring the girls to the school, you can have an easy morning."

"???!"

Oh I love my husband. He is a nice person, he is a good person. He is a good father. He works hard; and he is the son I never had, ha ha!

At 2.30pm pick up at school, Munisha says, "I saw P this morning, did you get to sleep in?" I tell her the story and I love the expression on her face. She understands.

Dinner with friends

We had a lovely dinner yesterday with Alison and Erik at their house, with Blai and Carmina. All very entertaining people, enjoyable company. It was too cute when Dagny showed her room to us, the place where Miss F knows too well!

Today, Leo and Carla came to visit us with Alex. First get together after more than a year. Always nice to see old friends! Carla is running the Chicago Marathon. I hope she'll survive it, she has problems with her feet and leg. Crazy lady, still doing it. Good luck Carla!

Dagny had her bday party today, so Miss F went to the farm. It was a truly beautiful day for that!

Tonight was the school fundraising dinner at John and Dianna's. Although none of us felt like going, the evening turned out to be very pleasant. It was a big dinner and the wine was amazing - not a coincidence if you think about the host - and everyone was quite relaxed and social. We had a sitter problem and we had Alia last moment. Diana was very nice to let us bring Miss N and let her sitter take care of her. She slept like a baby! upstairs while we were dining. The dinner lasted longer than we thought, when I arrived home Fauzia was sitting with Alia in our living room. Poor Alia looked so tired! P stayed longer and drove back with Tricia.

Gosh, got to go to sleep, it's too late!

Summer in brief

Just back from a lunch with Fauzia, I will use my last hour before I have to pick up Miss A to write. There are several things I should mention here. so much is happening and so little time to write, I'm chronically behind this journal.

I have to go back to summer first.

In June, we had Miss F's school play - was beautiful - and Miss A's ballet recital. Recital was two days in a row. P came to the Friday recital and missed Saturday, he was leaving for Europe. Miss A did a cute job. She did show how lefty she is, while all the girls were jumping right, she was jumping left. Well, we have it on DVD, so no more details. Miss A's group got the most applause for sure!!

After p left, I packed our stuff to leave for Turkey. But before we left, two things happened. Miss A lost her first tooth and Miss N discovered her hands. Both are moments to reflect on. Gosh they grow fast!

It's not the first time I left for Europe without my hubby, but it was the first time with three kids. Adding my usual stress about flying, I was beyond tiredness and stress when the limo came to pick us up - by the way, P ordered the limo for 2 hours before the plane left mixing up who's taking the plane, so I changed it to 3 hours before. When I'm over tired, I usually become very calm. So that was how the trip went. The kids did great in the plane and at the 7 hours lay over in Munic(love the business lounge!) For the first time, my parents couldn't come together to pick us up, we wouldn't have fitted in the car.

We spent the first two nights in Izmir, I wanted to meet my friends. I had a lovely dinner with Asli, Deniz A. and Hesna. On Friday, we left for Oren in two cars, we had Yanki with us. The first thing my father did - and it was great - was to take the kids to the shop and buy them new bikes. And those bikes were ridden!

I'll go over the vacation very quick, I have many pictures anyway. First 10 days, we had Yanki. Burak and the rest of his family joined us for a couple of them. Serap Abla was in Oren with the little daughter of Sedar Abi. The little girl and Miss F, almost same age, became friends. Then P's parents and Gerald, Edna, Sheila and Aaron arrived. P's parents had their little house 2 minutes from my parents' and the cousins were at Orient club. we travelled to Bergamom and Assos all together,, had dinner at the fish restaurant, at my parents and at Orient. Good days! Then everybody started leaving one by one. P was the last one and we realized I was leaving with the kids in two days and by the time I was in US, P was not back from Europe yet. So we decided to stay couple more days. Poor P had to call for hours to United to finally arrange tickets for us for a week later. By the time I was packed and unpacked twice.

The extra vacation was more than welcome. Miss A and Miss F had the chance to play more with their new friends. They were kids or grandchildren of neighbors, some speaking only German. The kids communicated in Turkish or English. They were all older then the girls which was maybe even better. Miss A and Miss F were like dolls. Miss A was always carried on someone's back playing hide and seek.

We also had the chance to stop by Foca, at my aunt's. Uncle Murat's daughter Lilya was there with a friend of hers. The last night before going to Izmir, Burak and I went out to Foca. I hardly ever spend alone time with my brother, so it was very special. We walked around the whole village and talked. After picking up Lilya and her friend who were also spending their last night in Foca, we went back to my aunt's. we, four kids, decided to have some ice cream before going to bed, which was too noisy for my dad. Just like little kids, we were shooed to our rooms - giggling!-

Going back to US after five weeks was nice and sad. It was probably the best vacation I had in Turkey with the kids. we landed O'hare almost at the same time as P who was coming back from Texas. We drove home together.

This vacation was special for me for another reason. I had to chance to talk to Serap Abla and heard how she was alone and bored in Oren when she was growing up. It was the proof that I was not weird, doing something wrong or paying the debt of anything. One day we visited her mother, Suna Teyze. The girls went to play right away and my mother, Serap Abla, Suna Teyze and I were talking. Suna Teyze said from out of blue how she thought I was such a lonely child with no kids around to play and so good at entertaining my self. This was a breakthrough for me, maybe a little late in life, but I feel like I'm freed of some long lasting issues this summer. I just feel better. Plus the girls found friends in Oren -because unlike when I was growing up, there are kids in Oren - I'm just happy and excited to go back next year.

Announcing a first and the end of the toothfairy innocence

Of course I could - and should be - announcing the first laugh, the first roll or the first steps. I will announce the first poop. Miss N has been having rice cereal and after that green beans for almost three weeks now. The green beans are more of a favorite, she's been eating eagerly for the last 3-4 days. Today, she was uncomfortable, she didn't nap more than an hour, too short for her age. after her green beans dinner, she was playing on the floor. She started crying and then it came, her first real, smelly poop. You might be wondering why I ever take time to write this. Well, let me tell you one thing, it was a big deal for her. She did NOT like it.

OK, I'll cut the crap, and tell more about the summer. Less stink than the poop story! In June, Miss A lost her first baby tooth. She was sooo proud of it. according to the dentist, she has five loose teeth, so it was no surprise that she lost another one just last week. loosing tooth means a visit from the tooth fairy. Miss F was always so excited about it and so happy to find a dollar in a zip lock bag under her pillow. I knew Miss F knows by now that mama papa are putting the money, not the tooth fairy. Her friend Hannah kind of spoiled it for her last spring. But we still had Miss A to surprise.

The evening of the second tooth, I heard Miss A crying in her bed. She said she was scared, and she is hardly ever. A guiltily smiling Miss F came to the room and said,
'She's scared of the tooth fairy, she thinks tooth fairy might be a witch.'
Took me seconds to find out that Miss F actually told her this. I gave Miss F a dirty look. What was she thinking! While I was trying to find a way to soothe Miss A and make sure she is not scared anymore but still believes in tooth fairy, Miss F continued,
'But Miss A, don't worry, there's no tooth fairy, it's just mama papa.'
Well, thank you! I denied, what could I do?!
I was leaving her, hoping that she believed me. How hard it is to fool those little ones! She called behind me with her sweet little voice,
'Mamaaaa, when you put the money under my pillow, can you give me six dollars?'

I thnik I'll be blogging more often once the school starts. There are so many things to tell! bye for now.

9 weeks, 4,5 kilos

It's already 9 weeks ago that Miss N is born. I know I should have been writing every single day about her little moves and changes, the reaction of her sisters and more. But it's busy with a baby, family, house, husband, myself... Although I did have time to go out to a movie one evening (Jane Eyre, was OK), it's hard to steal time from anything just to turn on the computer and write.

Miss N is taking most of my time, but she is the easiest baby we had. She just does her baby things. I went out to lunch with her couple of times, she just slept through the whole meal. She sits in the car seat for hours so tat I can go get the groceries and to the post office, pick up kids, bring them to their activities etc, etc....Since week 6 she is smiling more and more. This week, i can see more alertness, more reaction to our actions. She is falling in love with her sisters. Already, they are interesting for Miss N. Although she is the best sleeper we have, I still couldn't figure out a good schedule. Two weeks ago, she was sleeping at 9.30-10.00, waking up in the middle of the night, around 3.30, and then not sleeping for 1,5 hours. I thought it was a pattern. This week though, she wakes up at 1.00am and 4.00 something.

Anyway, let's leave the sleeping patterns. What did we do lately. P went to his first trip when Miss N was 3 weeks. Did I have help! I had dinner brought every day to our house. Miss F and Miss A grew overnight. They had an understanding, I needed help, I didn't manage everything as before. One morning I went downstairs and they had breakfast ready, even a bowl of cereal for me.

During the week P was gone, Miss F said once to Miss A, as a matter of fact way - not sad, not mad, maybe a bit teasing, "She(meaning me) loves her (meaning Miss N) more then us, you know." She said it when I could hear her and I know she didn't mean the exact words. She meant to explain to Miss A that I just needed to spend more time with the baby. How do I know that, I can't explain. If she had mean it, I would be hurt, but I understood that she understood our situation. My biggest help, my little mothers.

Miss N was 4 weeks when Miss A turned 5. So proud was she, with her huge basket. She made her lunch all by herself and didn't express any reproach or sadness for staying at school until 2.30 instead of 11.30. She did ask me to pick her up as the first, but she always does that, so what's new?! The same evening, we had a sitter and went to Brooke's 40th bday dinner. It was at a restaurant in Lake Forest. We arrived 40 minutes late because Miss N was crying and I just couldn't leave. I literally arrived trembling and the first thing I did was to order a gin and tonic, my only drink the whole night.

Our first outing as family was to the Museum of Science and Industry, which went quite fine with three kids.

when Miss N was 6 weeks, Siska came for a week. It was fun, busy but fun. We went shopping, out for lunch, to kids' activities - ballet and gymnastics. We spent Sunday at the Museum of Science and Industry, Siska and I saw the Body World exhibition. It was very interesting to see all the mummified bodies and body parts. Miss N didn't like it, though.I had to nurse her twice in three hours and walk around holding her. Nevertheless, the exhibition was great. The same evening, we had dinner downtown - with a baby!

We had quite some guests at home. Blai and Carmina, Anne and Jeff. After Siska left Melinda and Toni and their families came over for dinner. Then last weekend, we had the big party, Miss A's Indian bday party. I spent days and days driving around to buy the necessities, cutting Indian tunics and head pieces, drawing indian figures on the big canvas that we turned into a teepee. I shouldn't forget Siska's help with the goodie bags, that was a lot of work, too. We had 19 kids + our two and couple little ones. I had help from 2 middle school kids, otherwise I wouldn't have survived it. We had to do the head pieces and tunics in the basement, the weather was cold and cloudy. The kids painted the canvas on the garage floor. During all this, poor Miss N was held by everyone, except me. At the end, P set up the teepee in the backyard. It looked - and still looks - great! after the party, 5 families stayed for dinner. The kids played in the teepee for the whole evening. It was, I think a successful party, it was surely fun.

Finally, the party is over, there are no visitors, no big dinner plans... I finally had two days that I could enjoy being home with Miss N. She is making the baby noises and gets mad at me when I put her on her belly. She can spend quite some time alone, she looks around, traps her legs and waves her arms. When I go back to her, she smiles. I read quite some Jane Eyre, which I read for my coming book club. She is 4,5 kilos already, almost double the birth weight. She grows so fast, and the other two grow so fast... I just want to slow the time and watch them growing every inch, every knowledge, wisdom and maturity level. Don't want to miss a thing!

Baby oh Baby!

How much can somebody complain about pregnancy! I managed a good deal in the last ... 9 months. Some love being pregnant, I remember being over the clouds for the first two, but this time, I just couldn't wait it to be over. Tired, sick to my stomach and just uncomfortable, that's how it was. Oh, I did love the little kicks and the views of the little creature on the ultrasounds, of course I did. But it didn't stop me feeling like I was weeks overdue 3 weeks before my due date. I was just so sure this baby was going to be early, I think I gave everyone around me the same feeling of impatience.

When I went to the OB on Monday to hear that I was at just two and a half centimeter, I was truly disappointed. What was my fortune cookie saying just the Saturday before that: 'Good things come to the ones who wait. Be patient.' The air was full of signs that as a primer, this baby was coming after my due date. After March 26??!! That's like ages.

Then Monday evening at 11.30, I decided that I was not 'comfortable'. I couldn't go to bed. I walked around thinking, 'Will this go away, or are we on something?' 2 hours later, I decided to wake up P, I just couldn't count the minutes and honestly, I just didn't want to have contractions alone. P was deep asleep. Poor guy, he looked tired when he came downstairs to meet me. Then the contractions started to get stronger. I still wasn't sure, I didn't want to alarm everyone for nothing. But finally we decided to call Chris, who was my biggest support for this pregnancy, she was to take care of the other girls. P started calling, but we kept on getting her voice mail. The same for the home number and the same for Steve's cell. Then I started to get anxious. I was hoping that they were not at some other hospital with Steve's mother or something bad like that. I was also trying to think about our options. Who would come over to take care of the girls, or who would take them to their house? Who can we call in the middle of the night? P said he will go to Chris' door and knock, and tried to call their home for one last time. To our luck, Chris answered. She was over 15 minutes later and we were on our way to the hospital. It was after 2.00 am.

Last time at Condell, the ER was very crowded and I had to wait in line. This time I was lucky though, there were no one else to see. I got in a wheelchair in no time and was brought to the New Life Maternity Center. Everyone who saw me said "Oh, you are looking uncomfortable." They knew right away that I was to stay. Normally pregnant women go to the first room to be checked, if they are far enough, they are admitted. They brought me to the first room and after a look at my face, they brought me straight to the delivery room. The doctor was called, she was to come from Lake Forest. Mary Ellen, our doula arrived quite fast, she lives across the hospital. To my luck, the OB was Dr. Nakanishi, the nicest of the whole practice. While waiting for the OB, my contractions got stronger and stronger. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to wait for the doctor to arrive. But it was really our lucky day, she arrived just on time, and short after, Miss N was born. It was 3.43 am.

I wanted to hold her right away, Mary Ellen told the nurses to give the baby to me. I was in a state of extreme happiness. "She is so pretty" I kept on saying. After all the cleaning and apgar score etc, when they brought her back to me, I actually thought she was not so pretty. Oh well, Miss N, if you read this later, for your information, I think you are the prettiest little baby on earth. I just didn't like that they washed your hair I think. Oh, that hair of yours, the whole maternity wing had over your hair. So much and such a nice dark shade of brown.

I was brought to the recovery room, more a hotel room than a hospital room. P went home around 7am to wake up Chris and the kids. He brought the kids to the school and came back. He picked the kids up at 11.30 and brought them to the hospital. The girls were over the clouds!

I spent two nights at the hospital, which was really great for me. I let Miss N go to the nursery in the evenings so I could get some rest. P and the girls came over to visit everyday. Thursday, I went home with Miss N and now life goes on again. P spent 7 days at home and did such a great job running the household. We hardly had to cook thanks to the beautiful tradition of bringing over food when somebody is out of the hospital for any reason. We are still in this euphoria of happiness and I hope it will not leave the house for a long time. Miss N is already a part of this family, it's like she was meant to be here for years and we were waiting for her to come! And now, here she is!!

ER

While I'm sitting by my computer a the kitchen island, the wind is blowing like crazy outside. The big blizzard is all around us, swirling white pearls all over. Luckily, at this moment, there is no emergency on our side related to the storm.

It was months ago, someone was telling me about her emergency room trip with her son, he had a bad fever or something like that. I happened to tell her "Gosh, I'm glad we never had the emergency room experience with the girls." And I know how good I am at jinxing!!

Couple months later, at a P'less weekend, we started a beautiful day. It was Sunday, January 16 We saw Tangled with Tricia and the kids. Hannah and Miss F were giggling like teenagers behind us. After the movie, I took Miss F and Miss A ice skating. After we arrived, the rink started to get crowded with hockey players. I thought telling some to go to the other side, where the hockeyers are supposed to be. However, we were the only skaters, they seemed careful and I was keeping a close eye on the girls - I thought. I did tell the players who got close to the girls to be careful and to give them some space. At a certain moment, the rink got really crowded. I thou gt I should just take the girls to Westpark, where the rink is bigger, but on the other hand, we were almost going home. I actually started to get ready to go and gave the girls just a couple more minutes before I called them. One of those moments that you go back over and over again, I wish I just had called them at that moment! One moment they are skating, the other, Miss F is laying on the ice, crying!

She said she saw an older boy skate fast towards her. He must have been far, because I was watching the girls and there was no one close to them. She said as well that the boy was far, but he was very fast. Miss F thought he wouldn't stop, although at the last moment she saw the boy change direction. It was too late though, she got scared and made a weird turn.

Pretty scared to be on the ice with my pregnant belly, I ran to her as fast as I could. The blood gushing from her chin already made big stains on the white ice. I got her up to her feet, hoping that it wouldn't be a big cut. Of course it was, it was pretty nasty. After that, I had a Hulk moment. I don't exactly know how I did it, but in a very short time, I had two kids, still in their ice skates, in the car. I don't remember how I carried Miss F, because she is just too heavy for me at the moment, but I did.

We drove 60 miles and hour on the small streets to the... Emergency at Lake Forest Hospital. Our previous experiences with that hospital were less than pleasant, so I was a bit unsure about going there, but it was the closest place. I called Fauzia from the car, because Miss F spitted out pieces of teeth and I was devastated with the idea that her new teeth were broken. I literally thought she was missing half of her front teeth! Fauzia calmed me down a bit, I just had to go to the hospital and start from there.

Short after we arrived, we were taken care of. I knew she needed stitches. I asked right away for a plastic surgeon. Stitches on my pretty baby's face! The doctor came and took a look. Miss F was crying and I was holding her hand, trying to be calm so that she didn't get even more scared. The wound looked pretty deep to me and blood was still gushing. Miss A was watching silently. I signed her not to make a sound or say something so that she didn't scare Miss F. She was very brave and didn't interrupt a moment. She did get a good look at the wound.

The emergency room doctor got a bit angry with me for asking for a plastic surgeon. He said he could do as good job and the wound was under her chin. I should have asked him before asking for a plastic surgeon. I really didn't need the pressure. I told him I needed to talk to someone else before I make the decision. The doctor and the nurse left me alone with the kids. I started calling - luckily there was a phone on the wall, of course my cell battery was low! I just couldn't get a hold of anyone! Fauzia didn't answer her phone, p was nowhere to find... I finally got a hold of Nalissa. I had heard that her daughter had stitches lately. She told me her situation and why she choose a plastic surgeon. I was quite convinced by that moment that my decision was the right one. After talking to her, I got hold of Fauzia who assured me further and then I talked to P. When I told him we wanted to go on with a plastic surgeon, the doctor was not pleased but he did give us his number and acted more friendly when we were going home. Oh, I forgot to tell, the plastic surgeon was coming four hours later!! We were first going home to come back around 9 pm.

At home, I called Chris to see if she could have Miss A. After I told her the situation, she told me that the same plastic surgeon put stitches on Lauren's face. It was a disaster - not the result but the process. Well, exactly what I needed, knowing how scared Miss F was already about getting stitches. I needed help, I needed another grown up with me. Steve agreed to come to the hospital. Gosh we are so lucky with such friends! In the mean time, I managed to find a sitter for Miss A so that she didn't have to leave the house while I was gone with her sister.

Just a little side story here. I called couple people to see if they were available to babysit. One of the girls was not home but her mother was. I told her the situation and asked if Veronica was available. She was not home. After I hung up, our neighbor called back to say that they heard my message and that their daughter would be happy to come over to help out. While I was on the phone, I got a call from Veronica's number. I called back. It was actually her mother calling back to offer help, she wanted to babysit for me. I thought it was so nice of her!

Back to the story... At home, Miss F was doing quite OK. She was actually doing hand stands!! We had dinner and brought Miss A to bed - she was not pleased! At 8.30, we left her with Gretta and picked up Steve. At the hospital, Dr Lu came to check the wound. The blood started gushing again. (A nurse gave me a chair so that I could sit by F, instead of standing. Nobody wanted me to go in labor at that moment!) The Doc said he will give the sedative shot without any local anesthetic - exactly what upset Lauren a year ago. The local would take 50 minutes to work he said. I still cannot believe that there is no local anesthetic that works faster. There are cooling sprays and other stuff, right!? But he insisted there was no option, and he knew nobody wanted to wait until 10pm. So he gave the shot and made my baby scream. Steve said "tell me when to hold her" and I said "sit on her!" but it was not necessary. Miss F calmed down pretty fast and got the stitches. My brave big little girl! Just looking at the scar made my heart hurt. When we went home, she looked tired and shaken, but OK. She slept that night right next to me and every time I woke up - and I did wake up quite often, I had that heavy feeling in my chest. "My beautiful girl" I thought "My beautiful girl!" I couldn't stop thinking why on earth I hadn't get the kids in the car and drove to Westpark. I saw it coming. Why? I still think about it time to time, and feel bad.

I almost forgot to write about the teeth. Well, she did chip some teeth, but baby teeth. Her new teeth were intact and I am so thankful for that!

Blizzard is going on and so is my story. Oh, yes I am not done.

Five days after the stitches, on Friday, we went to the Doctor Lu's office to get the stitches out. Unfortunately, Miss F's friends told her that taking off the stitches hurted more than getting them. She was so nervous! It was of course no big deal and I told her to tell her friends how it went. Her face looks better than I expected. Of course there is a scar, it's not on a visible spot and it's healing beautifully. After telling that she would never ever skate again, she said last week to P that she actually would like to get new skates from Holland.

Before the stitches were out, I had a little moment with Miss A. As I said before, she saw everything, the wound, the blood... I hadn't realize the effect of the events on her, I was so focused on Miss F. Days after the stitches, out of nowhere, she started asking questions about wounds and blood and what happens to people when they bleed. Poor thing thought that her sister's wound would stay open forever. I'm glad she saw the closed wound and the much better looking scar and I think she is OK.

This brings us to Saturday, January 23rd. I'll tell this one next time.